BEMA Episode Link: 218: Midrash — Death at Dinner
Episode Length: 32:45
Published Date: Thu, 06 May 2021 01:00:00 -0700
Session 6
About this episode:

Marty Solomon and Brent Billings journey back into the story of Eliezer finding Rebekah as a wife for Isaac. What is happening at dinner that evening? Why is Laban acting with such authority if the father, Bethuel, is alive and well?

Discussion Video for BEMA 218

Map of Abraham’s Servant Finding Isaac a Wife — Headwaters Christian Resources

BEMA 12: A Mission Realized

Sefaria: A Living Library of Jewish Texts

Transcript for BEMA 218

Notes

*Note: The following notes are handwritten by me, Adam, and I reserve the right to be wrong.

BEMA Episode 218: Midrash — Death at Dinner

Title & Source Summary

Episode: 218 - Midrash — Death at Dinner Hosts: Marty Solomon and Brent Billings Focus: Genesis 24 - The story of Eliezer finding Rebekah (Rivkah) as a wife for Isaac

This episode explores the midrashic interpretation of Genesis 24, one of the longest chapters in the Bible. The hosts examine the often-overlooked details of Abraham’s servant Eliezer’s journey to find a wife for Isaac, focusing particularly on the family dynamics at dinner when Eliezer arrives at the house of Bethuel and Laban. The midrash suggests a darker narrative beneath the surface involving greed, deception, and divine judgment, culminating in the shocking claim that Bethuel died during the dinner. This story illuminates themes of hospitality versus greed, genuine commitment to God’s purposes versus self-interest, and provides important context for understanding Rebekah’s character and later New Testament references.

Key Takeaways

• Genesis 24 is the eighth longest chapter in the Bible by word count, and its length and repetition suggest deliberate literary significance
• Eliezer’s prayer for a sign of radical hospitality reveals that he was seeking someone with the right character, not just the right family connection
• Rebekah’s willingness to water ten camels (an estimated 100-200 trips to the well) demonstrated extraordinary hospitality that distinguished her as the right wife for Isaac
• The midrash interprets Laban’s eager reception and quick actions as attempts to get ahead of his father Bethuel and control the negotiations for personal gain
• According to midrashic tradition, Bethuel died during dinner due to his greed, which is why he is conspicuously absent when gifts are distributed
• Eliezer’s wisdom in giving the valuable gifts directly to Rebekah (rather than to her family as a traditional dowry) ensured she would be free to make her own choice
• The emphasis on “mother and brothers” (not father) in this story becomes a remez (hint) that Jesus references when asked about his own family
• Rebekah’s character is established here as someone committed to God’s purposes rather than material wealth, which provides important context for understanding her later actions in the Jacob narrative
• The story contrasts two motivations: pursuit of wealth and gifts (Laban and Bethuel) versus commitment to God’s mission and radical hospitality (Rebekah)

Main Concepts & Theories

The Eighth Longest Chapter and Literary Significance

Genesis 24 stands as the eighth longest chapter in the entire Bible by word count. The chapter’s length is notable not just for its size, but for its unusual structure - the story is told once by the narrator, and then Eliezer retells the entire story to Laban’s family. This repetition invites readers to look for subtle differences and deeper meanings. While the hosts acknowledge they haven’t found a definitive chiastic structure or comprehensive explanation for all the differences between the two tellings, the very fact that the text takes time to record the full retelling (rather than simply stating “Eliezer told them what happened”) suggests intentional literary craftsmanship that warrants careful attention.

The Test of Radical Hospitality

Eliezer’s prayer at the well represents one of the most specific requests for divine guidance in Scripture. He asks God to identify the right woman through an act of extraordinary service: she must not only give him a drink when asked, but volunteer to water all ten of his camels until they are completely satisfied. In the ancient Near Eastern context, this would require an estimated 100-200 trips down into the cistern, as each thirsty camel after a long journey would require approximately 10-20 trips to be fully watered. This wasn’t a simple gesture of politeness but a test of character revealing someone committed to radical hospitality.

Eliezer’s wisdom in crafting this test shows he understood that finding the right wife for Isaac wasn’t merely about family connections or beauty, but about character alignment with Abraham’s household values. The family of Abraham was defined by hospitality - Abraham himself had welcomed the three visitors under the oaks of Mamre. Eliezer needed to find someone who shared this fundamental commitment. The fact that God answered “before he had even finished praying” emphasizes divine sovereignty and the rightness of Rebekah as the chosen one.

Laban’s Premature Authority and the Absence of Bethuel

A careful reading of the text reveals an anomaly in the family dynamics. When Rebekah returns home, she tells “her mother’s household” - not her father. When someone runs out to greet Eliezer, it is Laban, Rebekah’s brother, not Bethuel the father. The text specifically notes that Laban’s motivation occurred “as soon as he had seen the nose ring, and the bracelets on his sister’s arms” - the valuable gifts catching his attention.

In the patriarchal culture of the ancient Near East, it should have been Bethuel’s responsibility to welcome the visitor and conduct negotiations for his daughter’s marriage. Yet Laban usurps this role, rushing out to bring Eliezer in, preparing everything, and moving the process forward with unusual speed. The midrash interprets this as Laban attempting to control the situation before his father Bethuel could interfere and complicate the negotiations with excessive demands for wealth.

The Midrashic Interpretation: Death During Dinner

The most dramatic claim of the midrash concerns Bethuel’s fate. According to this rabbinic interpretation, Bethuel’s greed was so extreme that God struck him down during the dinner itself. The textual evidence for this interpretation includes:

1. The name “Bethuel” itself, which can mean “God destroys” - the midrash sees this as prophetic
2. Bethuel’s absence during the gift-giving despite being present for the initial response
3. The specific mention of gifts going to “her brother and to her mother” but conspicuously not to the father
4. Laban’s assumption of authority despite Bethuel initially being present

The midrash portrays both Bethuel and Laban as motivated by greed, each trying to extract maximum wealth from Abraham’s wealthy household. However, while Laban was sneaky and quick-moving, Bethuel’s greed reached a level that demanded divine judgment.

Eliezer’s Strategic Gift-Giving

The distribution of gifts reveals Eliezer’s discernment and wisdom. Rather than following traditional protocols where a dowry would go to the family (specifically to the father), Eliezer gives “gold and silver jewelry and articles of clothing” directly to Rebekah. To her brother and mother, he gives “costly gifts” - which the midrash specifies as fruit, a dramatically different category of gift.

This strategic choice served multiple purposes:

1. It ensured that Rebekah herself would possess the wealth, preventing the family from keeping it if she stayed
2. It signaled that Eliezer understood the family’s true motivations and would not reward their greed
3. It empowered Rebekah to make her own decision, as the wealth would travel with her regardless of family pressure
4. It demonstrated that Eliezer valued the right person over family politics or traditional protocols

The Climactic Question: “Will You Go?”

When Laban and the mother try to delay Rebekah’s departure (“Let the young woman remain with us ten days or so”), Eliezer refuses to be detained. This leads to the pivotal moment: “Let’s call the young woman and ask her about it.” In a patriarchal culture where women rarely had direct say in marriage arrangements, this question itself is remarkable.

Rebekah’s immediate response - “I will go” - represents the climax of the narrative. She makes this choice having received the gifts directly, knowing the family wants her to stay, but more importantly, having heard about God’s work in Abraham’s family and wanting to be part of it. The midrash emphasizes that her decision was based not on the gold bracelets but on her alignment with God’s purposes. She demonstrated the same value system shown at the well - commitment to serving others and participating in God’s mission rather than pursuing material wealth.

Character Context for Understanding Rebekah

The episode deliberately explores this story after having previously examined the Jacob-Esau narrative where Rebekah helps Jacob receive the blessing. The hosts emphasize that understanding Rebekah’s character as established in Genesis 24 - as someone committed to hospitality, God’s purposes, and willing to sacrifice for those values - reframes her later actions. She is not a deceiver motivated by favoritism, but someone who understands God’s calling and acts accordingly, even at personal cost.

Jesus’s Remez to This Story

Marty proposes that Jesus references this specific story when his family comes looking for him. When told “Your mother and your brothers are outside,” Jesus responds, “Who are my mother and my brothers?” The specific pairing of “mother and brothers” (without mentioning father) appears uniquely in this Genesis narrative, as Bethuel is conspicuously absent.

Jesus’s question, in this interpretation, functions as a remez (hint) pointing back to Rebekah’s story. Just as Rebekah had to choose between family members motivated by wealth and gifts versus commitment to God’s purposes, Jesus’s followers must choose between family expectations and Kingdom priorities. Jesus isn’t rejecting his biological family but teaching about the priority of being “about what God is being about” rather than being motivated by what benefits one might receive (signs, healings, political power, etc.).

Examples & Applications

Ancient Near Eastern Hospitality Standards

The practice of watering camels provides concrete understanding of ancient hospitality customs. A single camel after a long journey might drink 20-30 gallons of water. With ten camels, Rebekah would have needed to draw and carry hundreds of gallons of water from the cistern. In the hot climate, using the technology of the time (a single jar carried on the shoulder), this would have taken hours of exhausting labor. This wasn’t offering someone a glass of water; it was committing to extensive, sacrificial service for complete strangers.

Dowry Customs and Eliezer’s Innovation

Traditional dowry practices in the ancient Near East involved payment to the bride’s family, compensating them for the loss of a household member and establishing the marriage contract. By giving the substantial gifts directly to Rebekah rather than to Bethuel or Laban, Eliezer broke with convention in a way that protected Rebekah’s autonomy and signaled his recognition of the family’s problematic motivations.

Laban’s Pattern of Behavior

Understanding Laban’s character in Genesis 24 provides context for his later interactions with Jacob. When Jacob arrives at Laban’s household years later, he comes empty-handed, without the bracelets and gifts that Eliezer brought for Rebekah. The midrash specifically notes this contrast. Laban’s pattern of greed, manipulation, and deception (seen here in his rushing to control the negotiations) continues in his treatment of Jacob, whom he tricks regarding Leah and Rachel and exploits for twenty years.

Family vs. Kingdom Priorities in Discipleship

Jesus’s reference to “mother and brothers” when his family seeks him parallels the choice Rebekah faced. In both cases, biological family members have their own agenda - they want the person to be who they want them to be, to serve family interests. But the Kingdom call requires prioritizing God’s purposes even when it creates tension with family expectations. This doesn’t mean rejecting family, but establishing proper priorities when conflicts arise.

Character Over Credentials

Eliezer could have simply gone to Abraham’s relatives and negotiated a marriage with any eligible woman from the right family. Instead, he sought someone with specific character qualities demonstrated through actions. This principle applies to leadership selection, partnership decisions, and community building - alignment of values and character matters more than credentials, connections, or external qualifications.

Potential Areas for Further Exploration

Literary Analysis of the Double Telling

A detailed comparison of the narrator’s account of events versus Eliezer’s retelling to the family could reveal additional insights. What details does Eliezer emphasize? What does he minimize? How does he frame the story to persuade his audience? This rhetorical analysis might reveal additional layers of meaning.

The Role of Women’s Agency in Biblical Narratives

Genesis 24 stands out for the direct question posed to Rebekah: “Will you go with this man?” Comparing this with other biblical marriage narratives could illuminate patterns of women’s agency and choice in Scripture, challenging assumptions about women’s total passivity in ancient Israelite culture.

Comparative Midrash Study

This episode focuses on one midrashic interpretation of Genesis 24. Exploring other rabbinic commentaries on this passage could reveal additional perspectives on the family dynamics, the meaning of specific details (like the exact weight of the gifts), and the theological significance of the story within Jewish tradition.

Typological Connections to New Testament Theology

Beyond Jesus’s direct remez, the story contains potential typological parallels worth exploring: Eliezer as a servant sent to secure a bride for the master’s son, Rebekah’s journey to an unknown land to marry someone she hasn’t met, the theme of choosing God’s purposes over immediate family interests. These patterns may prefigure aspects of New Testament ecclesiology and eschatology.

The Theology of Divine Providence

The phrase “before he had even finished praying” and the remarkable specificity of the prayer’s answer raise questions about divine providence, prayer, and guidance. How should contemporary readers understand and apply principles of seeking and recognizing God’s direction from this narrative?

Greed as a Theme in Genesis

Examining greed as a recurring theme throughout Genesis - from the Fall, through the patriarchal narratives, to Joseph and his brothers - could reveal how the text consistently contrasts those who trust God’s provision with those who grasp for wealth and security through their own schemes.

Archaeological and Historical Context

Research into ancient Mesopotamian marriage customs, dowry practices, household authority structures, and hospitality norms could provide additional historical context that either supports or challenges the midrashic interpretations presented in this episode.

Comprehension Questions

1. According to the midrashic interpretation presented in this episode, why did Laban rush out to greet Eliezer and try to move the process forward so quickly, and how does this connect to his later characterization in the Jacob narrative?

2. Explain the significance of Eliezer’s prayer for a sign of radical hospitality. What did this test reveal about Rebekah’s character, and why was this more important than simply finding someone from Abraham’s family line?

3. What textual evidence does the midrash use to support the claim that Bethuel died during the dinner? List at least three specific details from the text that point to this interpretation.

4. How did Eliezer’s strategic distribution of gifts differ from traditional dowry practices, and what purposes did this serve in empowering Rebekah to make her own decision about leaving with him?

5. How does Jesus’s response “Who are my mother and my brothers?” function as a remez to the story of Rebekah, and what theological point is he making about the priority of Kingdom purposes over family expectations?

Summary

BEMA Episode 218 reveals hidden depths in the familiar story of how Isaac got his wife. Through midrashic interpretation, what appears to be a straightforward romance narrative becomes a complex study in competing motivations - greed versus generosity, self-interest versus Kingdom purpose, family politics versus divine calling.

The episode establishes Rebekah as a woman of extraordinary character demonstrated through radical hospitality, someone willing to perform hours of exhausting labor for strangers without any expectation of reward. This character quality, not beauty or family connection, was what Eliezer sought through his specific prayer, and what God confirmed by answering before the prayer was even finished.

Behind the scenes, the midrash reveals family dysfunction driven by greed. Laban, motivated by the sight of valuable jewelry, rushes to take control of the situation before his father Bethuel can complicate matters. According to rabbinic tradition, Bethuel’s greed was so extreme that God judged him with death during the dinner itself - evidenced by his conspicuous absence when gifts are distributed and the unusual authority Laban exercises despite not being the patriarch.

Eliezer demonstrates remarkable wisdom by giving the substantial gifts directly to Rebekah rather than following traditional dowry protocols. This ensures that when the family tries to delay her departure, she has both the resources and the autonomy to make her own choice. Her immediate response - “I will go” - reveals she has chosen to align with God’s purposes rather than her family’s pursuit of wealth.

This story provides crucial context for understanding Rebekah’s later actions in the Jacob narrative, establishing her as someone committed to God’s mission rather than a manipulative deceiver. It also becomes the foundation for a teaching moment when Jesus references “mother and brothers” to distinguish between those who merely want benefits from him versus those genuinely committed to the Kingdom of God. The episode ultimately challenges us to examine our own motivations - are we pursuing God’s purposes or merely seeking what we can gain?

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